DISCLAIMER: These tributes are fan creations and do not represent official statements from Dimash Qudaibergen, his team, or any organization. They are written in the spirit of fun, creativity, and heartfelt admiration.
IMAGINARY STATEMENT FROM Dimash Qudaibergen TO ALL DEARS ON THE PLANET (and from a few neighboring planets as well)
Dear Dears,
I have observed very carefully that every time I announce a concert, some of you immediately enter a state that could be described as:
“Sherlock Holmes Mode.”
Within minutes, maps, theories, calculations, compasses, telescopes, and people analyzing the Earth’s tilt appear in order to figure out the name of the stadium, the ticket prices, and when ticket sales will begin.
Therefore, I feel obliged to remind you of something very important:
When I announce a concert, my main intention is for you to be happy.
Yes, happy.
Not to study the name of the stadium using photographs taken by satellites.
Not to calculate the exact ticket price based on the position of Saturn.
Not to analyze the thickness of the letters on the poster in order to deduce the ticket sale date.
All of that will arrive when it is meant to arrive.
That is to say: Soon.
The prices will arrive.
The tickets will arrive.
The schedules will arrive.
The announcements will arrive.
They may even arrive before some of the theories you are currently developing.
I have also observed another extraordinary phenomenon:
Some Dears try to determine whom I love more based on the city chosen for each concert.
My dear ones…
That is not how it works.
If I announce a concert in one city, it does not mean I love the others any less.
In the same way that, if I eat an apple, it does not mean I like apples more than pears.
I love all of you equally.
Those who travel thousands of kilometers to see me and those who accompany me from home.
Therefore, I would like to propose a revolutionary plan:
If you can attend the concert, devote your energy to packing your suitcases, finding accommodation, booking flights, and checking for the fifth time that your passport is still exactly where it was ten minutes ago.
If you cannot attend, prepare your livestream schedules, supplies, drinks, tissues, and your phone charger.
That is precisely why I allow livestreams.
Because I want all my Dears to be present, regardless of the distance.
And who knows…
Technology advances very quickly.
I cannot promise anything, but I also cannot rule out that one day I might manage to come out of the screen, travel through the Wi-Fi, cross the living room, and personally hug the Dears who could not attend.
My team has asked me not to try.
But you already know that I have never been especially famous for being particularly obedient.
With all my affection,
Your Dimash
ATTACHED POSTSCRIPTS: (things my team told me not to add to this statement)
P.S. 1:
If I discover you measuring maps with a ruler on your phone screen to find out the name of the stadium before anyone else, the concert will be temporarily moved to the Moon.
P.S. 2:
I have seen Dears creating theories using lunar phases, weather forecasts, and the migratory movements of birds.
I admire you.
You worry me a little, but I admire you.
P.S. 3:
If the name of a stadium is accidentally reflected in my glasses during an interview, it does not mean the next concert will be held there.
It also does not mean that it will not be held there.
In fact, it means nothing.
It is just an interview and they are just glasses.
P.S. 4:
I know very well that, after a Soon, if one of my posts contains a #, some Dears will find a way to turn it into a clue.
If it contains two #, they will find two clues.
If it contains none, they will find three.
Dears, the information is not hidden in a secret code within my posts.
As far as I know.
P.S. 5:
If any Dear manages to travel through time to learn the exact ticket sale date before the official announcement, I strongly ask them not to publish fifty contradictory theories on the internet.
Knowing you, they would eventually become one hundred.
P.S. 6:
The love I feel for you is not measured in the number of concerts, kilometers, countries, cities, or stadiums.
It is measured in metric tons of affection distributed equally.
Please do not speculate about whom I love more.
P.S. 7:
If you cannot come to the concert, I will look for you by staring directly into the camera during the livestream.
And if one day I manage to come out of the screen to hug you, I promise I will go back in afterward.
I do not want to live forever inside your living rooms.
Especially if you have cats.
Cats behave as if they own the house, and I do not wish to have any diplomatic conflicts with them.
P.S. 8:
If you continue speculating too much, the next announcement will be made exclusively through smoke signals, Morse code, Persian hieroglyphs, whale songs, and messages carried by carrier pigeons.
Even so, I suspect someone will find a clue hidden in the pigeons’ behavior.
P.S. 9:
If one day I announce a concert and all of you remain calm, relaxed, and patient…
I will immediately know that you have been replaced by machines.
In that case, the real concert will consist of locating all the original Dears and hugging them.
Yes, I said all of them.
Even those who are currently looking for hidden clues in these postscripts.
